Playing Catch Up

Great cartoon by Dan Wasserman of the Boston Globe, reprinted in the IHT.


Hamas winning the elections also puts Lebanon in a precarious position regarding the Palestinian "guests" and their guns question. We now have yet another envoy to tackle that situation. I love all this high-level mediation that does absolutely nothing except raise the profile of the envoy and ultimately ends with them trying to force-feed Lebanon some crap solution.
PM Saniora said after a meeting with Egyptian president Mubarak (who is sponsoring the mediation: "Palestinian weapons in the camps should be brought under control and there is no reason why they should leave these camps."

How about "There is no reason why Palestinian weapons should be in the camps at all."? Works for me.


Also, a wonderful Beirut headline states: "Extraordinary Parliament Session May Lead To Heated Political Debate." and it wasn't in The Onion.
Doesn't that tickle anyone's funny bone? Am I just blinking in the dark here?


And this story about a Kiwi dog food company wanting to send food aid to Kenya made me laugh uncontrollably, although it's really not that funny.

Enjoy.

7 Things....

Finally did it. Obviously for the "attracted to" section you can add your own subject.

7 things to do before I die:

1. Fly to the edge of space.
2. Swim with Great Whites.
3. See the England football team win another star for their strip.
4. Land a blue marlin .
5. Brew the perfect beer.
6. Have my 80th birthday.
7. Learn to play guitar.

7 things I cannot do:

1. Support France in anything.
2. Drink absinthe - what is that?
3. Put a good book down.
4. Laugh convincingly at unfunny jokes just to be polite.
5. Let a bully get away with it.
6. Forgive & forget.
7. Explain the offside rule to women.

7 things I say:

1. Dude.
2. Waynak? (or of course, waynik?)
3. Shyeah, right.
4. Fuck off.
5. No way.
6. Whatcha doin'?
7. I'll have one of the large, please.

7 books I have loved: (I cheated a little here.)

1. The Baroque Cycle by Neal Stephenson.
2. All of Douglas Adams (with emphasis on the Salmon of Doubt.)
3. All of Louis de Bernieres.
4. Pillars of the Earth by Ken Follet.
5. Damon Runyon's Omnibus.
6. All of Stephen King (except the Dark Tower series.)
7. All of Terry Pratchett.

7 movies I have loved:

1. The Big Hit.
2. Restoration.
3. Apocalypse Now.
4. The Godfather I & II.
5. The Hitcher.
6. Animal House.
7. The French Connection.

7 things that attract me to.....London:

1. Sunday newspapers.
2. Live music.
3. Theatre.
4. Billions of restaurants.
5. Parks.
6. Real pubs.
7. My lovely Chelsea (you saw that coming, dincha?)

7 people to tag:

1. MacDara
2. Scarl0
3. Graeme
4. Beirut Bill
5. Deeelite
6. John-no
7. Dylan
   

Enjoy.

Cry Havoc

The meeting between Assad and Ahmadinejad in Damascus earlier last week produced the expected mumbles about the need for stability in Lebanon and their support for the Resistance. Of course, these days those two statements are mutually exclusive.
I mention it only now because it's been keeping me thinking - not a state of mind I like to be in too often - and it worries me what sort of mad scientist plan they have concocted along with Hezbollah, these leaders whose backs are, internationally speaking, against the wall.
Not having anything to lose is not a state of mind that can be reasoned with and the human impulse to not go down alone is a strong one. A scorched earth policy would be the endgame here as both sides have proved that they are either unable or unwilling to act as statesmen. Thug is the word that comes to mind. Plenty of other words do too but I won’t get carried away.

The UN has again called on Lebanon to disarm Hezbollah. Although the statement seems more directed towards Syria than towards Lebanon, it's still a sign that the international community hasn't forgotten. The Lebanese government hasn't even ordered them to disarm, as if ignoring the situation will make it will go away. Desperate times call for desperate measures, people. Find the cojones.
Amazingly, resolution 1559 was passed in September 2004.
Aahhh, I remember it as if it was yesterday....

The news this morning carried the hardly surprising news that Sven's been forced out. So in the Reality League that's Gutter Press-1, Sense of Proportion-0.
As usual, a pretty one-sided game and no match report necessary.

A lot on my mind this month - my lovely Chelsea playing Barcelona again in the Champion's League. Jammy fecking LiverPoo, minging whiners that they are, get Benfica. I know I've said this before, but the time draws near and the reality is setting in like some depression-inducing concrete. Mind you, the Poo's way-overhyped weekend "Clash Of The Titans" against Manure FC was boredom personified. Yawnfest.
Luckily, before I tense up and get all stressed over anything, the Six Nations starts in less than 2 weeks. It's a good time to be a sports fan, sports fans.

In case you're wondering, I've removed Michael Totten's link from my sidebar because he's starting to believe his own publicity and is in danger of disappearing up his own fundament. For those of you wishing to link to him yourselves, he's still here.

If you are sitting around at work with not a lot to do and have access to the net, do yourselves a favour and go here. Download the StumbleUpon toolbar and enjoy some great sites chosen according to your preferences. Some of the gems that I've come across in my Stumbles include this and this. One of my absolute favourites is this guy, but make sure you check out his archives especially Steve, Don't Eat It! Nasty.

Alright, I've been tagged by GrocerJack. I'm gonna go and do the 7 things thingy and post it later. Consider 7 of yourselves warned.

Enjoy.

*Update*....this tagging thing isn't that easy after all. You can be pretty sure I won't be posting it today. For those who were about to be tagged - a reprieve.

A Purely English Post

A detective constable in Nottingham faces the sack after being recorded on video calling a career criminal “pondlife”. The remarks were caught on tape during an unrelated covert operation investigating corruption. The detective was told that the criminal, with many previous convictions, could have been offended had he heard it. The other officers who were with the detective at the time may also face disciplinary action.
When they have robbed your house, mugged you, conned you and killed you, you’ll be happy to know that their fragile psyches won’t be damaged by police insults.
Political correctness can kiss my arse. Go ahead, make my day. Bring back Dirty Harry.

While on the subject of England, I was watching the whole Sven thing unfold on Sky news last weekend. The weather came up and there was a map of the UK with clouds a-swirling around it and rain a-lashing down and generally ugliness of a meteorological nature.
I watched as the weathergirl (or do I have to say weatherperson?) said there would be rain in eastern Britain and pointed to Anglia. I watched as she said rain in western Britain and pointed to Wales.
But I watched and fumed as she pointed to northern Britain and said there would be rain in Scotland.

In last Sunday’s Sunday Times, Minette Marrin has an article entitled ‘England is waking up to the patriot game.’
In it she discusses Gordon Brown’s ridiculous touting of ‘Britishness’. She writes that Brown “feels a worrying excess of Scottishness, well corroborated in opinion polls” and that it is a “nail-biting” problem for him. She continues “Generally speaking most people in England quite like the Scots, even though they seem to hate us. Surveys show we find their accents suggest intelligence and reliability. Politically speaking, however, this easy affection is disappearing fast, as Brown is well aware. Devolution in Scotland and Wales – fought for and introduced by new Labour – has much undermined our common sense of Britishness and fostered instead a new and rather irritable sense of Englishness in the South. Meanwhile Scots feel more Scottish and less British than at any time since 1707, according to some surveys, led astray, possibly by films such as Braveheart.

More importantly the English public is beginning to sit up and take notice of the famous West Lothian question – the problem first identified by the then MP for West Lothian, that Scottish MP’s at Westminster can vote and carry the Commons on domestic policies such as education and health that don’t affect them or their constituencies. The government has increasingly relied on the Scottish vote to push through purely English legislation, against English votes, and yet the reverse is not true; English MP’s have no say over comparable Scottish affairs.
This is obviously unfair, as is the fact that more taxpayers’ money goes to Scotland, per head, for public services than in England, following the old Barnett formula. Devolution has made this long-standing injustice feel worse.
In response, a feeling of English separatism is growing; the English hardly need Scotland and Wales and would be freer and richer without them”……..…. “so (in order for him to reach his ambition to be PM) Brown has to persuade us somehow that he is not that Scottish at all.
No, he’s British. We’re all British (though this leaves out the question of the Northern Irish who aren’t exactly British.) He might even fly the Union Jack. But these questions are not going to go away”……..”The big ideas of Britishness and national identity are now much too fragile to serve the purposes of an ambitious socialist like Brown. There is some justice in that.”

This dismantling of England by the Scottish Mafia (the G-Man excepted) is so insidious.
And AA Gill, that small man-complexed wannabe Scot writer for the Times, is a cunt. (Excuse my language, I won't call him a man again.) Read any of his articles for proof. In the same vein, I used to really like Jeremy Clarkson, a writer and TV presenter for Top Gear, until I found out they are best friends.
There. Enough said.

Weekend Warrior

What a good weekend.
The News Of The World must be desperate if they think their "sting operation" on Sven Goran Eriksson was actually news. I've watched it on TV and read about it and still can't find anything that Sven said or did morally or legally wrong. I like to watch the mighty fall just as much as the next news voyeur, but I don't think setting up someone and then carefully editing their words to fit a scandal actually counts as a headline.
On top of it all, why try and bring down the England coach in a World Cup year?
Maybe, juuust maybe, that's what really pisses me off....

Tit-for-tat alive and well and living somewhere near here. To paraphrase Samir Geagea, "if they (the pro-Syrian camp) hold a big demonstration, we'll hold a bigger one."
My dad can beat up your dad.

My lovely Chelsea powered through to a well-deserved win against Sunderland last night. Arjen Robben got himself a ludicrous second yellow card and a sending-off for celebrating his winning goal with the fans. The ref is obviously a closet Arse-nal fan.

That's pretty much it. I've got the Sunday Times AND the Sunday Telegraph to read.
Joy.

Verbal Diary

Check me out. Over a week with no posting. No particular reason, just wasn't really interested enough by anything to write about it.
I did use the time to read other people's blogs, all the ones on my list and many others, and was quite surprised at how many reasons I saw there are for actually blogging - some do it to vent, some do it for money, some do it in a genuine desire to inform, some are on an ego trip, some are just keeping a journal.
Personally, I do it because a drinking buddy told me I was one of his Pepys.

And now, on to stuff that's been annoying me.
Guest (n.) - One who is a recipient of hospitality at the home or table of another.

Why do we still refer to the Palestinians in Lebanon as guests? Why do they have more weapons and autonomy inside our country than we do? Why do we accept that they be used as another way for Syria to terrorize and intimidate us?
If in any other country foreign guests decided to take potshots at officers of the law in the course of carrying out their duties, those guests' feet wouldn't touch the ground as they were rapidly and very forcefully dealt with, with incarcerations and deportations and other good stuff all round. A spokesman for the Palestinian group said that, apparently, the officers had provoked the gunman - of course they did, they were bill-collecting.
A strong response from the Lebanese government is required.

How can we be expected to have a 'normal' relationship with Syria, as suggested by Saud Prince Saud al-Faisal? Until the truth comes out about the killings and disappearances there can't be any real reconciliation. Draw as many border lines as you like, exchange diplomatic representations and words until you are blue in the face but the underlying problem is still there.
Commissions for Truth and Reconciliation under various names have been put to work in countries from South Africa to Fiji and maybe something along those lines is needed here.

Then I think about it a bit longer and laugh at the thought of any of the main protagonists being honest about anything.

Also, happy thoughts what with the Iranian government pursuing nuclear capabilities. I get a warm, fuzzy feeling knowing that a stable, democratic regime run by rational, progressive, liberal technocrats are developing the ability to blow the Middle East back to the Middle Ages.
Although some of you naysayers might say that it would only take a very small explosion to push us back there (and in some aspects you are correct) this does have major repercussions for the rest of the world. If Pakistan, being West-friendly, got busted for disseminating nuclear technology throughout the Islamic world for money, can you imagine what could happen if Iran decided to pass on their know-how or even worse, the finished product, to their allies and protégés?

Gordon Brown thinks we should have a day to celebrate "Britishness". All I really want to say on the matter is this - before being British, I'm English. Can we sort that out first?
I am not spitting on the Union flag, quite the opposite, but there's no way I'm going to celebrate yet another attempt to make England and all that she stands for, irrelevant. While we're on the subject, one of the always brilliant gifts I got from my mam for Christmas was a leather passport cover from Smythson. In black leather, it has embossed on the top front "United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland". The wonderfully cheeky part was the 3 lions covering the rest of it.

Oh crap, there's that warm, fuzzy feeling again. Have a good weekend.

Take 3

The second Khaddam interview was mysteriously postponed yesterday. It was supposed to air around 9pm last night but there was nothing. An "informed source in Beirut" said that it was only postponed for 24 hours but I have heard another reason which seems to make sense.
Khaddam has obviously had his diplomatic passport revoked and as a result, he has no status in Paris. One way he could sidestep this problem would be to declare political persecution and request political asylum in France. The most important factor in being accepted as a political refugee is that you refrain from making any political comments at all - hence the sudden disappearance of the interview.
If true, this is another problem that needs resolving because I think Chirac, just as much as the rest of us, wants to hear him speak publicly for posterity about the crimes committed by the Assad regime.

In other news, Ariel Sharon, the Israeli PM is in intensive care after suffering a massive stroke. I have already heard rumours from friends who claim they heard on the radio that he was dead but I have been unable to find anything in the mainstream media. I'll update if anything changes.

Jack Straw visited Lebanon yesterday and met with PM Saniora but snubbed Lahoud. Nice. Not a big fan of Straw's, but that was nice.

And on a final note, I think that after the flop of his last film, Jim Carrey has had a career change and is moving to Stamford Bridge to play with my lovely Chelsea under the unlikely name of Maniche (he also does a great Portuguese accent - uncanny!). He should bring a smile to any midfield.

Enjoy.

Take 2

Update - I fixed the link...thanks for the emails!

Look forward to some more comments from our friendly, neighbourhood Syrian whistleblower ex-VP Khaddam on TV tonight. Despite all of your disbelief, it seems that there is still more dirt to dish on the Assad-run regime.
Rustom Ghazali had his 15 minutes of fame yesterday on TV when he declared that he would "step down and even die as a martyr if his leadership wanted."
Martyr? Did he really say martyr? Man, them's some big balls.

It is also looking more likely that Khaddam will somehow present himself as an alternative for leadership in Syria when Assad & his thugs are forced to pack their bags and run for the hills. Unfortunately, Khaddam's 30-something years as a top Baathist architect in the Syrian government only prepared him to be Assad Lite at best. Democracy doesn't become your 'thing' in a lightning bolt in the way, say, religion (or for that matter, lightning itself) supposedly can.
Anyway, to quote Yoda, "interesting still may this become."

Quiet week so far. Enjoy.

Taking A Baath

Happy New Year everyone.

Ex-Syrian vice-president Abdel Halim Khaddam must be really gutted that the ruling Syrian Baath party has expelled him. Not only that, the Syrian "Parliament" has voted (unanimously, no less) to have him tried for treason and also, from an irony-free zone, corruption. I bet he didn't see that coming.

The UN Hariri probe team will now ask to interview Syrian President Bashar Assad as well as his Foreign Minister Farouk al-Sharaa following Khaddam's explosive TV interview. It's incredible how the most damning of evidence comes from the centre of the viper's nest when even up until a few days ago we were wondering if the Hariri probe would regain its former impetus. An interesting tidbit from BBC news stated that Khaddam had been in Paris with his family since June, when he quit his post very quietly.

I think Khaddam's main worry now is not to commit suicide, which I imagine is easier in Paris than downtown Damascus.

President Lahoud is now claiming that he and Rafic Hariri were the best of friends. Well, not exactly those words....what he actually said was that he had "a respectful and positive relationship" with ex-PM Hariri, but coming from him it, you have to admit that it sounds as ludicrous as my interpretation.

Now that the Syrian regime is scrambling to retain some semblance of credibility, the coming week should provide moments of hilarity, absurdity and good old Soviet-style propaganda. Let's just hope that no one decent has to die violently because of it. Keeping my fingers crossed seems to be as effective a deterrent as any.


The New Year celebrations around the country were suitably muted. I had a great time and even (against all of my BEST efforts) awoke on January 1st without an accompanying hangover. I'm not sure whether to feel proud or disappointed in myself. That day also contained a full English and builder's tea - later on a 10 litre keg of beer was tapped and and left a lot lighter than it was when opened. Good times, good times.

My lovely Chelsea play today against West Ham, Frank Lampard and Joe Cole's former team. Frankie has asked the Hammers' fans to respect him and not boo but I don't think that's going to help much. If you gave up a player who went on to become England's finest with London's finest, you'd boo hoo too.
Another thing to look forward to - my horoscope says that my self-confidence will today attract members of the opposite sex in bewildering numbers. A quick check on the meaning of bewildering: to cause one to lose one's bearings; to disorient.
Zero is a number, right? Man, I'm lost.


Farris Hassan is back home finally. The American 16-year old went to Iraq apparently inspired by a course in immersion journalism without telling anyone. He managed to get to Baghdad and stay in a hotel used by Westerners where presumably he cacked himself for a week.
Idiot.
Him and anyone who says he was brave and adventurous.
Not every growth experience should require the services of the 101st Airborne Division.

Have a good one.

Another Bombshell

Yesterday Abdel-Halim Khaddam, Syria's former vice-president all but pointed the finger at Bashar Assad for the murder of Rafik Hariri. He stated in an interview last night on Al-Arabiya television that Assad and his intelligence officers had "openly & repeatedly threatened to crush" former Prime Minister Hariri well before his February 14th assassination.
When asked if a Syrian security unit could have been behind the murder without Assad's knowledge, Khaddam replied "Impossible in Syria - Assad is an absolute authoritarian."

Khaddam ain't no angel despite the urge to see him as an ally after this bloodletting. Even though he claims that he advised Hariri that "the Damascene mood was unfavourable and that he should resign the premiership and leave Lebanon" Khaddam is anti-Assad, not pro-Lebanon. What a guy. He goes on to say that Lahoud and his inner circle poisoned Assad's mind against Hariri with disinformation.
He seems to be positioning himself to be a candidate for the top Syrian seat when it becomes available. Just remember that "I was only following orders" has been refuted as an excuse since Nuremberg.

Nice to see the regime start to collapse one strut at a time. Maybe all the inner circle, current and former, would tell the truth if they lived in luxury in Paris.

Now is a good time for President Lahoud to make an executive decision popular with everyone and step down. Just how far removed from reality is he if he can't (or won't) even gauge an overwhelming public opinion?

(Cue Star Wars' theme and......fade).

New Year's Heave

Good morning all. I hope you enjoyed your Christmas holidays and are looking forward to the New Year's celebrations. They seem to be a bit subdued for obvious reasons with so many people opting to stay home this year.

Thankfully, not a lot of anything newsworthy happened over the Christmas week. The Pope used his first Christmas address to ask for peace in the Middle East and the Holy Land – I guess that’s a good thing really, although its effectiveness is somewhat dubious. No harm in asking though.

The old joke says it all where God has come to Earth to grant a child from each country a wish. Each kid asks for impossible things, like mountains made of sweets or the ability to become invisible and each time He granted their crazy wishes, God laughed.
He got to the Lebanese child and asked what his wish was. The child said “Peace in the Middle East.”
And God cried.

Christmas Day at our place was bustling. Two turkeys went under the knife washed down with copious amounts of the grape. My highlight was sitting on the end of Skye’s bed on Christmas Eve while her mam told her a bedtime story and her dad was prancing about outside her bedroom window with Christmas bells, pretending to be Santa on his way to work. The look on her face was priceless, but even more amusing to me was the thought of The Dude jumping around outside in the freezing, pouring rain trying to get some sort of reindeer rhythm going. It really gets a lot more Python-esque in my head the more I think of it.

And here we are at the weekend again, 2006 mere hours away. The best part of the week was that there were 2 games for my lovely Chelsea and 2 Chelsea wins. I missed them both times (circumstances beyond my control) but I shan't be letting them out of my sight this coming week.
Can't think of any New Year's resolutions that I haven't made and broken before so I'll promise nothing and be pleasantly surprised if anything good does come about. Don't even know what I'm gonna be doing tonight - I'd like to be tucked up in bed with a good book come midnight, but failing that I'd like to be holding an economy-sized cocktail and covered in confetti, glitter and raunchy women wearing nothing but party hats and smiles.

But hey, that's just me. Have a great New Year's Eve.

St. George Is Cross

What is it with the sour grapes whenever England does well? When an English restaurant was voted the best in the world by a prestigious 'foodie' magazine, the French and Italians went off in spasms about it. Our winning the Webb Ellis trophy made France, Wales, Ireland & Scotland collectively shudder as we became the first Northern Hemisphere country to do it.
Now even our winning the vote to host the Olympic Games for 2012 has been called a "voting error".
God knows what's going to happen when we bring home the World Cup next year.

Reading Grocer Jack's post about being English set me to thinking. It's true that we seem almost apologetic for being who we are. The weight of our history seems to have made us overly PC when in all reality, we have more to be proud of than ashamed of. Why do the Welsh celebrate St. David's day, the Scots St. Andrew's day, the Irish St. Patrick's day yet most English don't even know when St. George's Day is? It's April 23rd, FYI.
My ma told me that when she was a lass, St. George's Day was a day off of school, Church service and all the rest. What happened? Here in Lebanon, MacDara last year flew in an Irish band to play in the Irish pub he had appropriated for St. Paddy's.

The only time I'm able to flaunt my Englishness is when England are playing an international match of some sort - but, even though the flag sellers here have now started to set up shop in preparation for next year's World Cup, you cannot find a St. George's flag. Every other country under the sun has their flag on sale here except England....what's up with that? Go to the pub here to watch any international football match and you'll find there are Lebanese fans wearing the kit - Italy, Brazil, Germany, France, Spain, you name it, there will be someone wearing it.

Except for England. Only the English will be wearing the England shirts.

Now, it could be argued that it's the quality of our game that puts people off but those same fans wearing other countries' colours are wearing Premier League team shirts in regular season. In reality, it's the skewed perception of what it means to be English.

To quote GJ directly "It isn’t racist to declare your Scots heritage, nor your French, Spanish or whatever. However, being English seems to be associated to neo-nazi, Little Englander, racist thuggery."

Anyway, check out the Witanagemot Club website for more.
It's where the title of this post came from.

Broadly speaking, the Lebanese are multilingual and have no problem conversing in Arabic, French or English, or for that matter, a mix of all three. One thing that really annoys me is when non-Lebanese hear us speaking and automatically assume that we are snobs with no sense of identity. That is not an identity crisis - that is part of being Lebanese.

Words in other languages sometimes convey an idea better than the words in one's own language. Just look at English for examples - what is the English word for façade? Zeitgeist? Chef? Adieu? Cul de sac? Faux pas? Deja vu? There are translations but they are clumsy and never used.

I know some bright spark will chirp up with the fact that hello doesn't need to be said in 3 languages (Hi, kifak? Ça va?) at the same time, but most of the time that has nothing to do with pretence, merely a need to fill up the greeting! In English you can say 'hello' and it's over - in French, a quick 'bonjour' or 'Ça va?' and you're on your way. In Arabic, you're not getting away with that...even the quickest greeting has at least 2 or 3 back-and-forths.
Basing the analysis of an entire population on use of languages is not only lazy but also shortsighted and frankly, offensive.
There, it's out & I feel much better.

Nice to see the Cabinet meeting managed to take place despite the absence of the Shiite MP's.
Phew.

On that note, I shall take a couple day's leave for obvious reasons and see you (hopefully) on Monday.
Merry Christmas to you all, enjoy your weekend.

Al Moghtarebeen

To Lebanese Bloggers in the blogosphere, please post this article on your blogs to spread the word about this upcoming summer event.

Established in 2005 in the United States, Lebanon Expats and Moghtarebeen.com are the voice of Lebanese scholars, businessmen and professionals living abroad. Their mission is to promote the powerful presence of the Lebanese abroad by carrying on social activities that will improve standards of living, and economical activities that will create job opportunities in Lebanon.

This article is addressed to you from your brothers and sisters from around the world. We, the Lebanese abroad, have a very strong voice and we are taking action. You are not alone because the tragic events taking place in our beloved country have united us globally. The murder of our leaders, fathers, brothers and sisters are bring us closer together.

Al Moghtarebeen is planning to gather this summer in Beirut to show support for our people in Lebanon and to show the world that the millions of Lebanese abroad will not stand by watching all the tragedies unfold. We plan to travel in large numbers from different parts of the world to be there in Beirut and show everyone that we, the Lebanese--Muslims, Christians, Druze, and whatever else we believe in--are united in the name of our country, Lebanon.

We need the support of groups and organizations in Lebanon and around the world to make this event an unparalleled success and show the world who we are. We are a young group, born after the murder of Mr. Hariri and kept growing with the successive murders, the most recent of which was that of Mr. Tueni.

To all Lebanese groups, to An-Nahar and all media, ministries, embassies, universities, to Mr. Saniora, Mr. Jumblat, Mr. Berri, Mr. Hariri, Mr. Michel Aoun, Mrs. Setrida Geagea, Mr. Mohammad Fneich, and all Lebanese around the world, let us unite and work together to show the world that we are one.

Please check out our website at www.moghtarebeen.com – let us work together in support of Lebanon.

Blackout

It's nice to be back after a week of self-enforced semi silence. The past week's events made sure that there would be no pleasure in blogging for me - I didn't want to talk politics or read politics or hear politics and writing about anything else not only didn't inspire me, but seemed a tad crass. I also didn't read any of my fellow bloggers' pages for the same reasons, so my excuses to them as I have missed catching up, but on the plus side I do have a wealth of information to look forward to reading now.

Top 3 happenings for lifting me out of my funk this week are:

1. The seasonal return of Lindsay, Allegra & the Dude.
2. The uplifting scenes of Chelsea beating Arsenal 2-0 AT Highbury in a league match for the first time in 15 years. Of course, if I wanted to be generous I would say that the score should have been 2-1 but due to an acknowledged refereeing error, it wasn't. But it is Arsenal, so in all magnanimity, fuck 'em.
3. I enjoyed my first proper lamb roast of the year with yorkies, roast potatoes and all the trimmings.....all hail Ma!! This followed the Chelsea match...does it get any better?
   

In Lebanon today..... *YAWN*. Sorry, can't do it.

Oh wait, yes I can. Where do the grumbling Shiite members of Parliament get the arrogance to think that the country should bend to their will? Despite the fact that, to quote LP, "Hezbollah thrives on instability", how dare they still support the Syrian regime's stance and spew the same vile rhetoric and make ridiculous demands? The world points its finger in accusation for the killings in Lebanon and yet still Hezbollah refuses to acknowledge the will of the majority of the Lebanese people.
To add insult to injury, President Lahoud has refused to head Thursday's Cabinet session if the Shiite boycott continues - did everyone receive the same script?

"Why would we be part of this government if the policy is 'agree with what we say or we will have a majority vote?' This is an equation we refuse," said Hassan Fadlallah, Hezbollah MP.

Why? It's simple. The Lebanese Constitution states that the Cabinet makes its decisions by consensus which gives everyone a chance to air their views and grievances and discuss. The Constitution goes on to say that "if a consensus is not reached, the Cabinet then makes decisions by vote of the majority of attending members. When basic national issues are being decided, the required approval is that of two-thirds of the members of the council named in the Decree forming the Cabinet."

This allows the government to function even when certain parties try to hold it hostage. It's called a democracy - try one, you'll like it.

On a completely different tack (although one just as dear to me), what happened to the Champion's League draw? My lovely Chelsea drew Barcelona for the knockout stages, Bayern got AC Milan, Arse-nal will enjoy Real Madrid and LiverPoo go head-to-head against......Benfica?
UEFA, if you love them so much, just give them the cup already.
At least the knockouts will be hugely entertaining as long as you're not a Benfica fan.

Oh well, I'm going to go and do something constructive.

Zzzzzzzz

The Politics Of Fear

The killing of Gebran Tueni is yet another outrage against our nation's right to live in peace and freedom, an outrage against every human being's right to think, speak and live freely.

The impunity enjoyed by these murderers is sickening. What's even worse is the celebration by certain members of Hezballah of the assassination of a fellow Lebanese and then the walking out of Parliament when it came time to discuss the matter. How much longer can the majority of the country take them seriously as a political force when they don't play the game if they can't bring their own ball? It doesn't matter - there is a majority without them and a strong decision needs to be taken. The Cabinet needs to show strength of purpose and courage - we are all afraid, but our government has to lead the way because courage is not the absence of fear but the continuing despite its presence.

Another political assassination, another chance for some deranged copywriter somewhere to come up with another ludicrous name for the previously unheard of "group" that supposedly carried out the killing. The finger can only be pointed in one direction despite the usual indignant claims of innocence and cries of perfidy - to quote Jimmy Cliff, mon, "the harder they come, the harder they fall."
We need a lot more than simple moral outrage. We need a long memory and the energy and focus to not let this be swept under the carpet. (How is the investigation into Samir Kassir's assassination going? George Hawi's?)
Is there going to be a monstrous act such as this every time Syria comes under heavier international scrutiny, to divert everyone's attention away from the matter at hand? The new Mehlis report reinforces the blame directed at Syria for the assassination of Rafic Hariri, but in the wake of the Gebran Tueni murder this has not received the media attention it deserved.

Admittedly, in a psychotic parallel world where killers have PR agents, this would be considered a coup.

Murder, Inc.

Gebran Tueni has become the latest assassination victim on Lebanon's tottering path to freedom. Yet another car bomb exploded as he drove past it on the Mkalles road, just outside Beirut. Details are still a little sketchy but it seems to have been a powerful explosion, ironically near Monteverde where the UN Hariri investigation team have their HQ.
A vociferous anti-Syria campaigner, MP and editor-in-chief of the An-Nahar newspaper, Tueni was under no impressions that he was just as much a target as anyone else involved in the March 14 uprising and had only recently returned to Lebanon (some say as recently as yesterday) with his wife and baby twins from Paris, where they had been staying due to security concerns.
It seems that the attackers feel they have nothing to lose and that only spells disaster for Lebanon.

Full Circle

Back again at long last, although nowhere near long enough. London was freezing cold, wet and mostly grey and I loved every second of it. The Chelsea game was great even though there were no goals scored - the atmosphere was fantastic and even the line of policemen and stewards between us and the Pool fans did nothing to dampen the fun (or the stream of abuse volleyed from both sides). It is quite impressive to hear 3000 Liverpool fans singing "You'll Never Walk Alone", but not quite as impressive as 45000 Chelsea fans singing "You'll Never Get A Job" in tune and in reply.
The Shed End was as vociferous as ever although alcohol free. I left the Shed Bar to get to my seat early in the hopes of having a few inside before the match but was confronted with fridges full of soft drinks and water with the beer cunningly concealed under a plastic sheet - lest, I assume, we fans are driven wild and insane by the sight of it and decide to storm the coolers. Could happen.

The gang all arrived at various times last Saturday and we all met up in a pub in Soho. Then I came back. I'm sure the memories of the times in between going & coming will surface during the next week.

So what's been happening here since I left? The usual crap as far as I can tell following the news from London. I won't post about it now as it is no longer so topical. Except for the mass grave in Anjar, the former Syrian HQ in Lebanon - why is that not front page news still? Horrific, brutal stuff.

Well, it's good to be back in an odd way, and read that how you like.

Have a good weekend.

TGI Almost Time To Go

It seems that Detlev Mehlis will be leaving the Hariri investigation after its mandate ends on December 15th, whether or not it is extended. Apparently, there are German "political considerations" behind his leaving (read: we don't want our citizens targeted by the investigation's fallout) so it will be interesting to see where the next chief investigator will come from.

Nearing the top of the Syrian-compiled "Dumb & Dumber" list of grievances against Lebanon is a new cracker - floating garbage from the Sidon dump. Watch next week when the culprit will be that funny smell in Dora.

The 'Bad Sex In Fiction' award was given yesterday to Giles Coren. The award itself is pretty self-explanatory but the passages nominated are painful to read. The winning passage is a gargantuan run-on sentence full of punctuation and followed by the two word sentence "Like Zorro'. Brilliant.

Air ticket? Check.
Match ticket? Check.
Beer money? Check.
Now I'm ready to leave for a few days, so if there's anything you need from London, now might be the time to ask. Updates may be few and far between but I'll try and let you know how it's going. What started as a humble football trip has turned into a reunion of sorts with people flying in from all over the place - not planned really, just a serendipitous turn of events (and a bit of schedule juggling...). The usual suspects are going - the G-Man, Tony Soprano, as is The Dude and we may be graced by the appearance of Kenny Rogers with a cameo from Ginge. Vast quantities of alcohol will be consumed and a lot of bollocks will be talked.
Now honestly, what more could a man want?

How Much Is That Doggy In The Window?

A friend of mine has a 6 year old son that begged for a puppy for the longest time. They eventually bought him a beautiful labrador puppy and after the initial time it took them to get used to each other, the boy would take the puppy everywhere. One day, not too long ago, I was at their house watching a game and having some lunch when we heard this muffled yelp. We went to his son's room and asked what happened....."we were just playing" was the kid's reply as he lovingly stroked his pet.
We heard a couple more yelps after that, went in, asked the same question and predictably, got the same answer - and all the while we're there, he's petting the puppy. His dad told him to cut it out or the dog would be sitting with us in the other room.
"No, no" says his son, "we'll be quiet."
We shut the door but left a little crack open so we could watch and unbelievably, the kid was tormenting the dog, pinching it and making it squeal but as soon as we walked in he would pet it as though he loved it. Thankfully he finally got caught out and I'm glad I'm not the one to have to deal with those issues.
My point is that this story has so much in common with the new Syrian pirouette stance on Lebanon. I think you can match up the protagonists. Even the guy in the photo behind Saniora & Sharaa looks sceptical.

Also in the news is a mysterious masked witness that Syria has claimed was bribed into blah, blah, blah.....

Oh, by the way, the brat has not been allowed near another animal since.

Moving Along

Syria has decided to co-operate with the Mehlis investigation and send the six five senior officers to Vienna to be questioned. It appears that the one not going is Assad's brother-in-law. Interesting to note that the guarantee given to Syria by the Russian mediators (the former Soviet Union was Syria's major ally and armaments supplier) that if found guilty, the officers would not be arrested outside Syria, was considered an issue of sovereignty by the Syrian regime.
On a parallel track, a witness in the assassination of Hariri died mysteriously in a car accident. Considering our driving methods, you know it's serious when the Lebanese press call it mysterious.

Also, in an "intelligence" coup, Syria's official mouthpiece Ath-Thawra declared that there are 400 Mossad spies in Lebanon and that "these agents are encircling Lebanon like a belt and will explode when Israel and her strategic ally, the United States, have decided."
Exactly 400.

I would like to extend promised regrets (but short of an apology) to coolhoor for calling his team LiverPoo and promise not to call LiverPoo LiverPoo again. At least, not until LiverPoo's next game. My lovely Chelsea are back on form with a 2-0 win at Portsmouth and Frank Lampard set a new record.

And look how scary this is..... the American Taliban.